Beards are cool. They make you look distinguished and wise. They often speak of authority and character. However, some men lack the necessary extra shot of testosterone to grow a good beard. For those people there is always the Inflatable Beard.
Just blow it up and attach it to your face and bam. Instant beard in the style of an old time gentleman. Keep it in your pocket and when the need for a disguise arises, just put it on. It features elastic loops that hang on your ears.
Not itchy growth to deal with and no grooming. Only $4.00 from McPhee.